Happy Mothers Day.

I have always thought of my mom as my best friend (and twin), but it wasn't until I became a mother myself that I more fully understood and loved her for all she did for me. She has always been my example of selflessness in motherhood, eternal patience, and loving each child unconditionally. I love her for the hours she spent helping me organize stuffed animals on my bed to protect me from the monsters, for taking me to dance lessons every day of the week, for letting me go to mutual with her before I was even old enough, for not only cheering me on in school, but also being a vital part of my success, for driving me the 24 hours to Utah so I could start BYU, for always just being a phone call away, and for making me a better mother. For these things, and so many more I love her!When I got married I was blessed with another wonderful mother and example in my life. Obviously I think Jolene is a fantastic mother because I love the man she raised and am eternally grateful to her for him!! She is an example to me of many things but some that really stick out are teaching in the moment, keeping persepective, & having a life centered in your family. I love to laugh with her and am so grateful she is my mother-in-law and a grandmother to my children.
This is one of my favorite journal entries on being a mother:
Whenever things get hard around me I try to focus on the blessings in my life, on the many, many things that I have to be thankful for. Everyday, always, I am grateful to be a mother. I love my little boys more than my words have power to say. I found out that an old friend lost his little boy just weeks after he was born. My heart aches, in the deepest way, for him and his wife. Tonight I had to spend extra time just squeezing my boys and feeling grateful for every second I am blessed with to be their mother. I spent an extra long time just smiling with Parker. He gets so excited that he shakes from smiling so hard. It's adorable. It's my Parker. Bryan was at scuba class so Caden and I stayed up extra late watching Imagination Movers and eating colored goldfish. As soon as his show ended he yelled, "Again, please, now!" When I finally made him head to bed I laid next to him giving him ticklies, just like my mom used to do for me every night. (My mom was a saint, she spent so much time with us each night singing, tickling, and delivering drinks of water.) I'd tickle his face. When I'd stop he'd say, "arm," and hold it out for me to tickle. "Again, again." I think the ticklies were a big hit. I adore my boys. I cherish the simple moments with them. I thank my Father in Heaven for each of those simple moments we are blessed to share, and pray that there will be a life time full of them.
And lastly, Happy Mother's Day to all my incredible friends who are mothers. I am grateful for your example and encouragement as we go through similar experiences together. xoxo.

Visits.

This last week we have had the pleasure of spending lots of time with friends and family. With graduation it has really hit me how much I have taken for granted having my incredible extended family so close by.
I can say without hesitation that I have one of the most amazing extended families EVER! We get together, laugh til our sides hurt, and smile til our cheeks ache. We reminese and genuinely miss our cousins that aren't with us. We support eachother though the good and the bad. We celebrate eachothers accomplishments, and cheer eachother on though the different stages of life we are each in. I love these folks, and am so lucky to call them my family.
{This was us celebrating Cinco de Mayo with the best steak tacos I've ever tasted!}

This week we also got a visit from Erin & Liam. Bryan's college roommate, Matt, married the cutest girl ever, Erin, who is now one of my dearest friends. We've been so lucky to spend time with them each time they come to Utah to visit.

Liam & Parker. Caden & Ella

The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that they can grow separately without growing apart. -Elizabeth Foley

These two played by eachothers side for hours--doing seperate things. That's true friendship.

Smiles: not gonna happen.

Buh-Bye Jungle.

Hello Backyard!
Bry and he loyal assistant, Megan, worked all of last week to take out the existing jungle and replace it with beautiful green grass and a sprinkler system!! They toiled in rain & snow. I'm convinced this man can do just about anything. Caden's reaction: "WOOOOW daddy!"

Now are just waiting to see if we'll be around to use it...

Juris Doctorate.

Three and a half years ago we faced the tough decision of where to attend law school. Though BYU had an incredible program we never had really considered it an option because we were ready to move on. But after a lot of prayer we felt very impressed that Bryan should make BYU the school he received his Juris Doctorate from. Though there has been VERY FEW occasions, from time to time I have wondered if we should have chosen a different school. Thankfully, shortly after questioning our decision I have always been reassured that this is indeed where we were meant to be.

His graduation day was no exception. I was filled with so much pride and emotion as I watched him walk with his classmates to be hooded as a BYU law graduate. As one of the speakers said, this school is unique. Not only are they given one of the best educations in the country but they are taught principles on weightier matters. Judge J. Clifford Wallace of the United States Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit gave the address and the first thing he spoke about was priorities. He told the graduates that though they may have extremely demanding jobs they should keep their family followed by church callings, before work. He told them that if they could do this they would have extremely successful careers. He talked of honesty, and dedication, and the unique advantages they have by graduating from BYU. I truly believe I could not have been more proud had Bryan graduated from any of his other options. This school is incredible and I am thrilled that it is his Alumni!

{In front of the Provo Tabernacle.}{Before the ceremony.}{Being Hooded.}

{Receiving his diploma.}

Besides Bryan's actual education, this picture is what I will take away from law school. These three will stay with me forever. It's hard to believe that in those three short years this is the family we created. With my most heart felt love, I want to thank our incredible families for their support. I can truly say that we would not have made it through school without you all. There were many times when emotions ran high {yes, mostly for me--middle of the road Bryan doesn't seem capable of a freak out}, when money was tight {or non-existant}, when a car was on its last sputter, when we needed somewhere to stay and you allowed us to live in your already full home, when we wanted a date night, when Bryan just needed an extra word of encouragement--you were always there. We know you made sacrafices for our success and we hope you know how grateful we are.

{Erika & Colson--special thank you for watching the terror so we could enjoy the ceremony!}

{Proud Parents}

{Bryan & Kyle}Another reason chosing BYU has been such an immense blessing is because of the amazing friends we have made. Graduation was bittersweet for this reason. I found myself looking across the pews and being flooded with good memories followed by tears. I really can't put into words what these amazing people mean to us. All I can say is we are better for knowing them. I have a feeling I know where we will be spending our vacation time. ;)
{Me, Bry, Kyle, & Lesley}
Sorry, we missed you Mike and Jessica!!

{Bryan, Kyle, & Brandon}Congratulations Bryan! It's hard to believe that this chapter is closing. Maybe not for you, but for me it feels like just yesterday this was all just a dream. I love you more than words can say, and I am so, so proud of you and your many accomplishments these past three years. More than that though, I am so proud of the person you are. Thank you for letting me be a part of this journey with you. There is no one else in the world that I could {or would} have done this with. :)

Yo-Yo Effect.

Up. Down. Up. Down. Hanging Stagnant. Stuck. Jerked Up. Down. Up. Down. Looped.

Bryan is about to graduate law school and this is the perfect explanation of the past 3 years. I'm pretty positive the reason that I have felt this yo-yo effect is because I'm obsessive. In the past three years our dreams and goals for life have changed drastically and continuously. Truly, they have been ALL over the map. As an obsess-er, I don't just think about our future, I live it. With each job application I have mentally moved to each town, unpacked, and started my life. I've gotten to know the people, and embraced living in each very unique location. For the longest time I lived in Northern California surrounded by extended family. That changed. Why? I don't even know. Then for a year long clerkship I lived in a fishing town, right off the ocean {Ketchikan, Alaska} where I got to wear those cute rain boots since it pours most of the year there. I've raised my kids in Dallas, Texas where the school systems were incredible, my husband was a big wig litigator, and we owned a 5,000 sq. foot house in an adorable neighborhood among the most hospitable people. When this didn't work out, with tears in my eyes, I packed my bags and headed to North Carolina and my beautiful wrap around porch. For awhile I was an Airforce wife, as Bryan was in the JAG program. The Summerlin area in Vegas has also been home with it's awesome parks, running paths, and year round sun. My kids went to The Meadows and I paid $15,000 a year for them to wear plaid and go to kindergarten. I've stayed in Utah with my amazing anesthesiologist, had 12 kids that I could actually take out in public, my husband worked for a growing firm in Provo, we went to all the BYU sporting events, and stayed near our friends. I have even lived in a van down by the river.

This is my Yo-Yo Effect. We had dreams starting out. Then the market crashed half way through law school and since we have altered these dreams. We've sent out hundreds and hundreds of applications. My heart and my moving truck followed each application. We've been blessed with jobs, and we've had rejections. Things have felt right, and then they've felt wrong. Many hours have been spent on our knees.

Bryan graduates next Thursday and things are finally starting to fall into place. At this moment I feel like my yo-yo has finally been put down. {Hopefully I'm not jinxing myself by saying that.} Either way, along this journey I have been humbled and learned to place my faith in my Savior. His plan for us is better than anything we could have dreamed up ourselves. It might not have always been the easiest path, but I know it is the right one. As I press forward I'm sure my Yo-Yo will be picked up again for some other reason; I'm grateful to have this faith building experience to look back on for courage.

And can I just say, how unbelievable proud I am of my husband. As I'm writing this he is going on his 12th hour at school studying for his last finals. He has been so dedicated and determined and full of hope; I love him for that.

{3 Months Old}

Just can't get enough of this guy. He is so happy, and content, and snuggly. He's a tough little bugger too. He's on his 3rd ear infection in 2 months and I would never had known if he hadn't had scheduled rechecks. He doesn't cry. He's just fabulous. I had to put away the newborn clothes the other day. That's always sad for me. Shed a tear. My baby is getting bigger, but the personality that comes with him growing up is to die for.

Impromtu

My SIL, Megan, invited the boys and me on an impromptu trip to California. We jumped at the offer since Bryan had 5 papers to write and wanted to start studying for his LAST FINALS EVER!!!!!!!!! We had such a fun visit; Caden became completely attached to everyone. He is still walking around the house pretending to call Tami. Every morning we were there Caden woke up screaming, yes screaming, OUTSIDE! Guess I can't blame him. He was freed from the walls of the townhouse in beautiful weather. {refusing to stop running for even 5 seconds for a pictures with mom}
{not afraid of anyting: getting a lost ball.}He and his cousin, Evan, gave us a look into the future trouble they will cause together. One afternoon the girls were all sitting around talking, and it had been quiet for a little too long. Well, Evan had decided to show Caden how to escape. I run outside to find the two of them walking down the quarter mile drive. I start yelling for them to stop. They look at eachother, look at me, and take of running as fast as their little legs would carry them. I, of course, was dying laughing.Bryan saw this picture and says, "Who is that?!? OH, it's Nijia Jolene."
Grandma took them on lots of golf cart rides and let Caden feed the animals which he absolutely loved.{Yup, Caden is in a dog cage. Tami promised it was clean...that's what I tell myself so I don't feel like a bad parent. He refused to get out, so Evan tipped the cage over and ended that for me! :) }

We got to go over to see our friends, The Hulberts, and swim in their new current pool. Thank you, thank you...it was a blast to see everyone and hopefully I didn't seem too crazy chasing Caden around the pool. :)
{Sweet Parker just hung out all week. Loved all the attention.}I have no pictures to document the rest, but lets say lots of laughs were had just spending time with my in-laws playing Rook, going to parks, seeing the Last Song (yes, Miley made me cry), and watching Caden get attacked by a big red dinosour. Thank you for everything. It was worth it, even with Caden and Parker screaming the entire way home. Love you and miss you guys!